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When he
isn't burning down houses in Toronto, Imran is a quiet, unassuming individual
whose ego is proportional to the number of notes he plays per second--
which, when you think about it, isn't a lot. He started off with The
Attempted Band, but found that his girlfriend being the lead singer
in the band meant that he'd get pushed around. That's why he co-formed
The Watson Brothers, choosing instead to be pushed around by Metal Monster
Shakib. An admirer once said of him that "ever weeping gentle guitar
that gently weeps ever gentle like a guitar the weeps its gentle guitarish
weeping on the gentle guitar of weeping." That admirer, though
of Jewish extraction, knew more than he let on.
Imran enjoys self-pity, Archie comics, and long walks on the beach. He is at his best when Farhan pre-configures his POD tones for him. His achievements include, as we have said, playing multiple notes per second on his most beloved Stratocaster (it's happened twice, bunky), and burning houses down. This love of arson isn't personal: as he himself says of it, "there are hidden fires burning within me, hidden fires. Sometimes they are a docile flame, like a happy nuclear family, and sometimes they take on the Rage of Infinity." Imran, however, has not heard Dream Theater's album Falling Into Infinity. It is merely a coincidence that he uses this phrase, and Bangladeshi nitpickers should be informed that he is in no way stealing from that venerable rock band's achievements. Sometimes Imran's numerous friends at York University in Toronto, in hierarchical order according to penis length, sit around him in a circle and ask him to tell them of his troubles. He greatly enjoys this activity, but they usually leave after the story involving the time he discovered Arafat's morning juices on his bathroom floor-- and that ain't orange that we're talkin' about, bunky! His musical influences are best described in three letters and three periods: R.E.M, although it's been rumored that he has heard Simon and Garfunkel's The Boxer and, once, when trapped in the elevator of a grocery store from which he was stealing grapefruit, Eric Clapton's I Shot the Sheriff. Imran plays the role of The Flash in The Watson Brothers, even though he is slow in his playing style. This is because he has a pair of red sneakers, and also because he is quirky and funny. A lot of people laugh at him. Send him email at imran_utfz@thewatsonbrothers.com |